Tell us about Your Black Business & Urban Events, so we can share w/ the World!

Click Here to Add your BLACK OWNED BUSINESS to our Social Media Networking Directory for FREE! so we can share it with our 100,000+ Urban Professional AUDIENCE that range in age mostly from 25-54, have children, are graduate school educated and browse this site from home! via Alexa.com

Custom Search

My First Healthy Relationship/God Made Marriage

Today I have been married for a little over 2 Months, however, we dated for about a year and a half prior to that. I must say, I have never been happier in my life. Even when I was single, I didn't experience this much joy.

This is the first Healthy Relationship I have ever experienced. All my prior relationships were Abusive, whether it was Verbal, Mental, Emotional or Physical, they were all UNHEALTHY. I was so confused with what Love was, I thought my relationship with my son's father was Healthy until I met Patrick. Patrick made me see that Love and a Healthy Relationship consist of the following list: There are more, however, I chose to list these.

Shared Responsibility - We do NOT make any decisions without consulting with the other first. We make family/relationship decisions together. We agree on a distribution of work that is fair to both of us. Patrick isn't Shemar's father, but we share the responsibilities and behave as positive, non-violent role models for Shemar, Pat Jr. and Will (My Step-Sons). We also share the same amount of domestic duties and I absolutely LOVE THAT.

Honesty and Being Accountable - We communicate openly and truthfully. We admit our mistakes and we acknowledge our past bad behaviors.We accept full responsibility for our actions. We don't blame each other for why we may have chose to misbehave. We apologize and move forward.

Trust and Support - We support each other's goals in life and respect each other's rights. We understand we are individuals and have our own feelings, opinions, friends, activities and interest. I attend school with Patrick and he attends my Private Lessons with me. We are our biggest FANS!!!

Respect- We value each other's opinions. We listen to one another, and not only listen, but, in a non-judgmental manner. Respect also involves attempting to understand and affirm the other's emotions. Patrick is the first man I have ever respected. Without saying, he is the first Man that's ever respected me.

Negotiation and Being Fair- We are both willing to compromise, accept change, and seek mutually satisfying solutions to conflict. We agree to disagree and we never have a shouting match. This is something Patrick has taught me. He is a very humble and fair Man. I am the Negotiator. (-:

Economic Partnership

- In our marriage we make financial decisions together. We make sure both of us will benefit from the financial arrangements. Now there are times when either of us may make a sacrifice and allow the other reap the benefit and we love that. We are both Givers. We were both conditioned to spending when we wanted too, however, after we married, it was no problem consulting with each other. I have been hard headed once or twice, but no-one was affected. I made a decision and even though Patrick disagreed, it worked out for the both of us.

Non-Threatening Behavior

- When we disagree, we talk and act in a way that promotes both of us to feel safe in the relationship. We both feel comfortable and safe in expressing ourselves and in engaging in activities. There is NO ABUSE AT ALL.

WE LOVE and BELIEVE IN GOD- We keep GOD at the Forefront of our Marriage. We and with each other. GOD controls our Marriage.

Prior to Patrick, I was used to being called Stupid, Bitch, Whore, not trusted, no support for my dreams, lied to and the list goes on. I thought Love was buying me gifts, Good Sex and taking me out. Boy, was I wrong. I even mentioned in my Book, Perfectly Planned, that my son's father was a Good Man, well, I stand corrected.

Today, I have a GREAT Husband and I will never leave him. We believe in each other and we live by GOD's Laws according to Marriage. Most people will say, it's easier said than done, well WE will say this, I have done everything one can imagine. From sleeping with countless Men/ Women, traveling, spending enormous amounts of money, partying until we didn't remember anything, Menaje a Trois and of course the list goes on. So again, it's easy for us to say we will never part. Why would we, there is nothing left for us to do, but, Grow and Mature Spiritually, Financially, Mentally and Personally TOGETHER.

If you are married and would like to stay married, maintain the list, put GOD first and everything all other blessings will follow.

If you are Single and would like to Marry, know that list like the back of your hand, not only that BELIEVE IT and LIVE IT.

"Love is only True Love when it is Given and Received."

Kelly is the Author of Perfectly Planned!

Don't Lose Your Digital Life!

Come share your business and events with us and we will share your them with our network of over 100,000 Urban Professionals? Did you also want another Page One Listing on Google and the other Search Engines so that you will get even more traffic from the search engines? Do you also need more people calling and Emailing? Would you like to have a link with a Network that is top 300K site globally in terms of traffic and growing? Create a Profile Today for your business and events for only $4/mo AND GET ALL OF THE ABOVE PLUS MORE!!! ...which is less than a GOOD cup of coffee- go here to get started- we accept Pay Pal!
CLICK TO CREATE YOUR PROFILE!!!

The BFHS Network likes Ticket Leap because of their Flat Fees, ease...

Hot Today!

1	Warm Cinnamon Vanilla Bean Brown Sugar Body Scrub Added by Ohenewaa White-Ra on September 27, 2012
2	The NYPD has a Raymond Kelly Problem – Time to End His Reign -Must ... Added by Debbie Cunningham on September 10, 2012
3	Tales from a Job Interviewer: Top 4 Reasons Why I Will Never Call Y... Added by Debbie Cunningham on June 23, 2012
4	Why Should You Switch to Solavei? Added by Barbara Warren on September 25, 2012
5	My First Healthy Relationship/God Made Marriage Added by Kelly Porter on September 27, 2012

Tags: couples therapy, dating advice, dating advice for women, god made marriage, healthy relationships, how to improve mental health, low self esteem help, need marriage help, relationship consultant, relationship counselling, More…

Comment

You need to be a member of Black Folk Hot Spots #BlackBiz Community to add comments!

Join Black Folk Hot Spots #BlackBiz Community

Comment by Ryan ~CEO of the BFHS Network on October 5, 2012 at 8:20am

Hot Today!

1	#Chicago: Shop It Up Fall Expo: Sip & Shop ...the last event of... October 13, 2012 from 11am to 5pm at Charles A. Hayes Family Investment Center Organized By: beautifulblackbusinesswomen
2	Virtuous Vixen Relationship Cruise (Singles & Couples) ...FIND ... October 12, 2012 at 5pm to October 15, 2012 at 8am at Carnival Imagination, Nassau, Bahamas Organized By: Kania "The Virtuous Vixen" Kennedy
3	Please Vote TCM Radio Station as National Radio Station of the Year! September 25, 2012 to October 15, 2012 at Stellar Award Nomination Organized By: Patrece Myles
4	Black Ski Weekend #GATLINBURG, TN: 2013 Black Ski Weekend- Feb 1-2,... February 1, 2013 to February 4, 2013 at IN THE SMOKEY MOUNTAINS OF GATLINBURG, TN Organized By: Mid-Line Travel Services

RSS

Welcome to
Black Folk Hot Spots #BlackBiz Community

Sign Up
or Sign In

Or sign in with:

BFHS recommends:

Be Black, Buy Black, Think Black, and all else will take care of itself! #MarcusGarvey #BuyBlack #blackbusiness via http://bfhsnetwork.com/

CLICK BELOW TO Get Info On Black Business Specials and Urban Events by Email!

Your Ad here!

Our Mission is to link 1 MILLION Black Business owners together on the net They say it can't be done- We say it can! CREATE A PROFILE AT http://blackfolkhotspots.com/ so we can share your business and events with our network! -FOUNDER AND CEO OF BLACK FOLK HOT SPOTS

The BFHS Mission!!!

“The more people who join and use http://bfhsnetwork.com, the more useful it will become for the Black community. That’s our goal” ~CEO of BFHS

BFHS Network Videos

Right Now on the Black Folk Hot Spots Fan Page

What Every Black Entrepreneur Ought to Know About bfhsnetwork.com http://youtu....

Bold Statement Tees and Hoodies - Black Folk Hot Spots #BlackBiz Community http:...

If you're driving in #Wisconsin new ruling you should know.

#black Limited Edition Support Black Biz Tee | Order at http://bit.ly/1njUve4

MALCOLM X: WHO TAUGHT YOU TO HATE YOURSELF? (May 5, 1962) https://www.youtube.c...

More…

Badge

Loading…

Get Badge

Wanna Keep BFHS Alive? Ask how?

Forum

Where are the Black Bloggers? 31 Replies

Started by Iceman Baldy in Press Releases. Last reply by michelle roberts yesterday.

Small Business Solutions: eblast Services to Promote your business/service to up to 100,000+ starting at $50 today! [introductory pricing] 31 Replies

Started by Ryan ~CEO of the BFHS Network in eBlast. Last reply by Ryan ~CEO of the BFHS Network Nov 6, 2013.

da CEO of BFHS -Quote of the Day! Post your favorite quote! 26 Replies

Started by Ryan ~CEO of the BFHS Network in Press Releases. Last reply by Annette Butler Mar 2.

@fobsolutions wants to help you get more LIKES On Your Fanpage!!! Have you thought about customizing your business page on Facebook? 22 Replies

Started by Felecia Lastrapes in eBlast. Last reply by Ryan ~CEO of the BFHS Network Aug 30, 2011.

The BFHS Network needs 40 more events posted for January 2011, help us, help you! 18 Replies

Started by Ryan ~CEO of the BFHS Network in Press Releases. Last reply by Ryan ~CEO of the BFHS Network Jan 31, 2011.

Badges | Report an Issue | Terms of Service